Finding Yourself
by owlhipster
Summary: Dick tries to get over Wally's death by taking a leave of absence. During that time he falls in love with someone, while Tim becomes serious with Cassie.
1. Finding God

Even though Wally's body was never found they did throw him a funeral. His death took a toll on everyone, especially Dick and Artemis. They were the closest to him.

Everyone on the team went to the funeral, they understood the sacrifice that he had done, that he gave his life so others could live. He died an honorable death. During the funeral, Dick was supposed to say a few kind words about Wally, but as he walked up onto the stage he realized that there were no words to describe his friend. He wished he prepared something in advance.

"Good evening, I was told that I should say something nice about my friend, my college Wally West. He was very kind man with a fondness for puns. I wish I could've spent more time with him. There is not one word that could actually describe Wally, he had a variety of qualities, both good and bad. He was a good person and his final act says more about him than a hundred word essay," Dick said trying to keep himself composed. This was the last time someone died on his watch. He felt so nervous, so scared, he ended his speech halfway through, he excused himself from the stage and sat down in the first row.

Dick decided to leave, he didn't belong here he killed his best friend. As he tried to leave Artemis ran behind him, "Dick wait!" she yelled. Dick turned around, he had already put the keys into the ignition.

"Dick, it wasn't your fault, it wasn't even your idea." Artemis said trying her best to convince Dick to stay at the funeral. Dick leaned onto his bike, "You don't understand, he was under my leadership. It _is_ my fault. I don't deserve to be here." Artemis walked towards Dick and put her hand on his shoulder. "Everybody dies someday. And who knows maybe Wally's alive in another dimension, where everything is better." Dick smiled. He didn't actually know how else to react. "Do you want me to help you clean up after everyone's gone?" Dick asked Artemis. Artemis leaned onto Dick putting her head onto his chest, "If you like you can, but Bart said he'd be more than happy to do the same."

Dick and Bart helped Artemis clean up the mess the guests made. Dick organized the foods people bought into labeled containers, while Bart picked up pieces of trash and food from the ground. They let Artemis get some rest, since her life was hectic at the moment, she planned the funeral, and then starting tomorrow would take over as Tigress in the team. Bart took out the trash and came back in under 3 seconds. "Hey Dick, are you coming in tomorrow for the team meeting?" Bart asked. Dick put the last container into the fridge, and turned around to talk to Bart, "I…No, I'm taking a leave of absence for a while." Bart was confused, Nightwing was a hero in the future, "Why is that?" Bart asked frowning. "Just need to rest for a break. But I'll be back before the next alien invasion. I promise." Dick hugged Bart, because Dick needed a hug. "You Okay?" Bart asked shocked at his act of affection. Dick laughed and squeezed Bart tighter. Bart vibrated out of Dick's grasp causing Dick to fall onto the wooden floor. It took Dick 0.1 seconds to realize that he was hitting the ground, and got a splinter trying to stop himself from falling.

He left her apartment, after receiving treatment for the wound. He took the short cut to his house, it still would take him more or less an hour and a half. It started raining, on his way back. Dick wanted to curse the skies, but he should've been more prepared by reading the weather forecast. He would usually drive in the rain but he had just changed his tires and it seemed like a bad idea. His bike skid a bit when he attempted to park it to find shelter in a church.

He didn't remember the last time he's been in a church, maybe after his parent's death. The inside was warm and inviting, with only three or four people inside, a homeless man, a teenage girl and her dog, and the Priest. He walked towards the end of the grand foyer, to meet with Priest. He felt like he was a bad Christian, since most of what he did was unorthodox. "Excuse me?" He said in a low whisper voice. "Hello, are you what brings you here?" Dick stood awkwardly now, he didn't know. The rain that soaked Dick also soaked the ground around him. "I don't know." Dick replied. The Priest had a smile on his face. "If you do not know, pray, son, you will find what you want."

Barbra waited at Dick's apartment with Tim. Tim was falling asleep on her shoulder while she was watching a TV special about some rare disease. She heard Tim snoring, she felt sorry for him because he was a fourteen year old boy living a double life. Unlike Dick, Tim had to go to school tomorrow morning. She got up and got him a blanket, from the linen closet. Barbra took off Tim's mask and fixed his position on the couch allowing him to sleep soundly on couch.

A soaked Dick parked his motorcycle, he took his keys out of the ignition and went upstairs to his apartment. He didn't actually expect Barbra and Tim to be in his apartment, so he was surprised when he found them. "Babs? Tim? What are you two doing here?" He asked. Barbra, who was sitting on an arm chair, shifted her sight to him. "Shh..don't wake up Tim. He fell asleep." Dick shut the door and sat on arm-rest of the couch that Tim fell asleep on. "You asked us to come over; I'm not sure why you're so surprised." Barbra whispered. Tim shifted on the couch and hit Dick with his arm. Barbra took Dick's hand, "Is it true? You're leaving the team?" Dick half-heartedly nodded. He didn't want to leave the team, he needed to leave it.

Barbra noticed something weird about Dick, not that he was wet, but the cross he was now wearing.


	2. Cracked and Exposed

**((AN: Sorry for such a long wait but 3POV is not my strongest point, bare with me guys, also if you have an suggestions I'll be more then happy to know!))**

Dick took the cross off his neck, "It's a cross, I went to a church before I came here, I needed to clear my mind of what's going on." Barbara laughed and snorted at the thought of a religious Dick. "You're kidding right?" She asked. Dick looked over his shoulder, "No, you don't understand this is the third person that dies under my watch I need to cleanse myself." He was serious he was going to be a religious man, he wanted to create a name for himself other than Nightwing. He wanted to be Dick Grayson.

Barbara felt slightly comforted at the thought of a stable Dick, one that isn't risking his life every other day. "What else are you going to do?" she asked. Dick took her hand again, "Look, I don't know everything right now but I promise you I'm alright." He let her hand go and walked around the apartment, "You could stay the night if you like. I don't mind. I'll write Tim an excuse because we've been working him out way too much." He poured two glasses of water one for him and one for Barbara. "I don't see why not," she said and nose kissed him.

Oddly, Dick and Barbara had a very open relationship, since they've been friends for a little over four years. They knew each other inside and out but to her Dick has been a bit distant lately. She loved him more than any of her ex-boyfriends she felt a connection with him. Maybe it was because the worked together, or maybe because it was some kind of chemistry together. "Do you mind sleeping in bed with me? I mean I would offer you the couch but, Tim…" Barbara laughed but agreed to Dick's proposal. She was confident that this was going to be the night she told him.

Barbara stripped her batgirl suit and borrowed one of Dick's shirts. She put it on and twirled around in it like she was at a ball. Dick caught her and thought that she was adorable doing that. Barbara saw him and sat on the bed quickly, she then patted the bed beside her, offering him a seat.

"It's good to see you getting your life back on track. You've been a bit hectic for a while after Wally's death. So are you going back to college or what?" Barbara asked and crossed her arms.  
"I don't know it's just not for me you know? You don't do much except his around and attend lectures" he said.  
"Well, hope about becoming a police officer it's a good mix of the two y'know. There is running and drug busts…" she suggested.  
"No…I'm more of night person, I think I might do better at a bar or something," he said and crossed and brushed some hair away from Barbara's eyes.  
She laughed again at his suggestion, "You do realize now that you're a practicing catholic you can't drink right? You're not even old enough to drink."  
"Well I guess I'll just have to work at a teenage bar or something..."  
"Yeah you can serve your own drink there. "Grayson on the rocks"" she joked.  
"Yeah, cola and shaved raspberry ice. It's wonderful." He sat down next to her and rested his head on her shoulder.

They talked for a while longer before their eyelids felt heavy and couldn't stay up much longer. Dick lied down next to Barbara and stroked her ginger hair, " I like this, hanging around with you. We should do this more often." He told her. He then kissed her forehead, "I like you Barbara." He whispered. Barbara smiled as he said that. "You're a really bad Christian you do know that, right?" he chuckled, "It's my first day." He said before pulling the blanket over himself and Barbara. They held hands under the blanket and fell asleep like kittens.

Tim woke up and rubbed his eyes. He noticed that his mask was gone but he found it on his table. He looked around at his surroundings, he recognized Dick's apartment by the mess in the kitchen. What Tim didn't know is how he got there, but he didn't care because he got some sleep. He checked the time on his watch, it was noon. Tim threw the blanket off of him and went to get something to eat since he was hungry.

Dick woke up holding Barbara in his arms. She woke up a few minutes later. The room was quiet as Dick and Barbara decided to stare into each other's eyes. "So would you like to go on a date?" he asked her quietly. Her eyes widened and shone with glee, "Yes! I would love to."

The cereal was on the top shelf and it was an odd flavor, it tasted like granola mixed with pine nuts and caramel. Tim didn't really care since his stomach was growling like crazy. He took off his gloves and his utility belt and placed them on the table. He then placed his breakfast on his table and started eating.

Barbara exited the room before Dick pulling him from his hand. "Come on," she said dragging him out. He was stronger than her but he didn't resist much. "Babs stop," he replied as he rubbed his eye with his hand. Tim, who was sitting right across from them chocked on his cereal. It was weird to see them together, especially because he thought of them as siblings.

"What are you guys doing?" Tim asked in confusion.  
"Not much we're just having fun." Dick replied.


End file.
